That Was The Week That Was
Last Friday saw us not so much go with the Flo as tell Flo to go. There can be no doubt that Tore Andre Flo split the Rangers support like very few other players have in the post Souness era. My opinion of him? Well, he had bags of skill and indeed will probably prove that once again in the Premiership. But the fact is, he was not what we needed and the money shelled out for him meant that he would forever be in the spotlight and judged against players who cost only a fraction of what we paid for his services. The only question which remains to be asked is why, why, why is the man who shelled out for him still at Ibrox drawing a handsome monthly salary?
However, I did find one of Alex McLeish's statements regards the sale as something of a puzzler. When asked why he was leaving, AM said words to the effect, 'Perhaps it was because he didn't score goals against Celtic.' Now it was Eck who decided to sell him, so he should have known why he was being sold. Giving us snash about 'Perhaps' just doesn't cut it with me.
There was of course something wholly ironic in Flo scoring against Man Utd in his debut last Saturday. But this game was made all the more delightful for Sir Awex showing once again that he is a moron of the highest order.
Ferguson's behaviour last week, when he told a disbelieving public in the aftermatch interview that McAteer made a meal of the 'David Yallop' he received on the head from Keane proved once and for all that this guy has no sense of right or wrong. No pwide in the concept of fair play whatsoever.
Of course it is only right that managers try to defend their charges in public, when necessary. But Ferguson abuses the privilege. Still why should we be surprised at the actions of a guy who has hidden behind his wife's religion and used that as a convenient excuse for not being good enough to make the grade at Ibrox? Ferguson should have been a yahoo. Just like his old man and his brother. Let's face it, he certainly acts like one.
Saturday morning gave me a giggle when Peter Lorimer revealed that a number of the 1974 Scottish World Cup squad sampled the delights of a German housewife after our draw with Brazil. According to 'hot shot', at least seven of the squad had their wicked way with her up in his hotel room. Not only that, but they were all finished and back down in the bar in less than a half an hour. Which means that your average Scottish player displays the same lack of talent in the bedroom as he does on the playing field. A complete lack of ball control! Still, you can't beat a perfectly timed soft boiled egg, can you?
Last Sunday of course saw us go through to one of the less salubrious parts of the Kingdom of Fife. (I don't fancy Dunfermline and its half-yahoo fans) Now I realise that we have been crying out for the team to kill dross off, and as such I have no complaints with the fact that the game was dead at half time. But the fact that the likes of Craig Brewster was still able to cause our central defence a handful of problems, causes this bear no end of anxiety. There were too many times Brewster was allowed to hold the ball up, which resulted in hurried clearances and half chances. It's just not good enough in my book.
Keeping with what is deemed as being acceptable and what is not? I don't know what other armchair Rangers fans made of the choir at times, but this is one bear who was thoroughly embarrassed with the 'Cheer up Martin O'Neill' stuff. The bottom line is, he at least got his team through to the CL qualifiers. Only when we do the same, can we start crawing about his sad football team. That's my opinion anyway.
On the field, once again though the inconsistency of the referee caused one of the game's main talking points. Now as far as I'm led to believe, if a player denies an opponent a goalscoring opportunity, then he is automatically red-carded. So why was Scott Wilson not sent packing last week, when he brought down Averladze for the penalty?
Now don't get me wrong. I don't think this law which automatically sees a player receive a straight red card because a goal scoring opportunity has been denied is totally fair. But there has got to be a greater deal of consistency shown. For example. How come it was OK for 'Nae nerves McNaughton' to receive an automatic red card at Ibrox the week previous, yet Wilson wasn't even given so much as a booking?
To my mind, this is another 'grey' area that could be cleared up if only referees were allowed to come out and explain their actions after the match. It would help clear up some of the uncertainty and frustrations, which build up on occasion.
Keeping with Wilson, he can count himself very fortunate indeed that both the referee and his assistant missed his leap n punch effort later on in the match, somehow. Rumour has it that Peter McCloy in the press box swooned at the notion that someone so tall could jump about and attack the ball with his hands with such vigour.
One last point about these half-yahoo Dunfermline fans. They like to tell us all that they are Scottish. Certainly more Scottish than Rangers fans. Yet there they were cheering and clapping with glee, when Scotland player Barry Ferguson went down apparently injured? No doubt about it. They are small town no marks. But what else should we expect from yahoo apologists?
I see that Glasgow's proviedistrictcooncil are about to demolish the wee Hinshelwood scheme at the Broomloan Rd end at Ibrox. (How very apt) My query here is quite simple and to the point. Will the council make Rangers the same offer they made Celtic a few years ago and give us that land for a penny? As I see it. If you want to eff the pope, then stop voting bigots into power. You know it makes sense.
Elsewhere, I do believe that Timothy and friends are about to have a bash in honour of the Greatest Ever Celt. At this point I'd like to throw in a couple of impromptu awards. First off, we have the 'Greatest Ever Septic Minded Scrote Who Didn't Actually Wear The Hoops' award.
To my mind wee Albert Craig must be in with a shout. Why Albert? I hear you ask. Well, I read recently that wee Albie has been involved in a nasty war of words with his dead sister's son and daughter. According to De niece and De nephew, Uncle Albie gambled away her life savings. Which only goes to prove. That if you look like a yahoo, spend all your time telling the world that you're a yahoo and you behave like one too, then you must in fact, be a yahoo. By their deeds ye shall know them. Wee Albie certainly cuts the mustard for me.
Next up we have the 'Quintessentially Celtic' lifetime award. Now there were a few in the running for this one. But to try and get even a hint of where I'm coming from with this one, then we need to go back to the words of Sir Boab Kelly in the aftermath of the yahoos' 4-0 cuffing of Rangers in the 69 Scottish Cup final.
According to Sir Boab, that victory was only a hint of things to come. That Celtic's future was all about bringing through youngsters and giving them a chance. That in fact, Celtic's whole ideology had always been based around youth.
Nor was he all that wrong, because as Rangers fans know only too well there have always been comparisons made about how both half's of the OF operate. Let's see now. Rangers buy experience/Celtic go for bringing through their own youth. Rangers elect for power play and big bones/Celtic opt for ball players and wee, cowerin, timorous beasties. (As MON has proved only too well. Ho, ho, ho)
Well OK then. Let's indulge the yahoos in their mythology. When Kelly was doing his gloatin¹ thing back in 1969, Celtic had a crop of kids coming through who were referred to as 'The Quality St Kids'? A fair number of them came through the ranks from Celtic Boys Club. But it didn't stop in the 60s, because there has always been a special tie-in between Celtic and Celtic Boys Club. Certainly in my lifetime anyway. In fact in the 70s and 80s the press here in Scotland used to keep us abreast of CBC's many achievements at the different age groups. Even when they played abroad.
So in my humble opinion, the man who set up Celtic Boys Club, helped perpetuate the myth that Celtic are all about nurturing youth and allowing it to flourish must be the man who epitomises what Celtic FC are all about. So step forward Jim Torbett for the 'Quintessentially Celtic' lifetime achievement. You deserve it.
Scotland started off their week with a 2-1 Under 21 International victory over Israel at Hamilton on Wednesday night. As for the hypocrites who brought out a heavy duty Police presence? What else is there left to be said about them, that hasn't been said before. They shout 'terrorist' at 19 and 20-year-old footballers but delight in the murder of British Soldiers or Protestants in Northern Ireland. They are to a man, scum!
Elsewhere, this midweek saw the 71st anniversary of the biggest tragedy on the park in Scottish footballing history. Seventy one years from the tragic death of John Thomson and still not one official word of censure or remorse from anyone officially connected with Celtic for the bitter, poisonous and disgusting remarks made by Celtic manager Willie Maley at the Fatal Accident Enquiry on Oct 15th 1931.
In fact matters are now exacerbated by the fact that yahoos, certainly the ones on the Internet, refuse even to acknowledge that Maley actually said these words at the Enquiry. It is the type of mentality and behaviour we have come to associate with those who still deny that the holocaust happened. It is all so typically, typically Celtic.
Let's keep with fascism in football. Wasn't it a hoot during the week reading that The Pope himself had stepped into a financial row which has broken out between Man Utd and Lazio over the Italian club's non payment of monies owed for the services of Jaap Stam. An even bigger giggle is that The Vatican Bank is keen to cut itself a deal with Lazio, who are of course one of the most fascist teams in the world. Septic and Lazio, eh? The Pope's 22. Put me down for a scarf.
So it's a break from football this weekend as Scotland take centre stage against the Faroe Islands. As I said a few weeks ago, the state of Scottish football is so bad at the moment that the powers that be shouldn't even be looking to qualify for the next European or World Cup tournaments. The notion that journalists here in Scotland are not 100% confident of a win on Saturday does rather drive home the point of just how low we have plummeted on the world stage.
Still, we can only hope that the Scottish strikers score as quickly and as often as their predecessors did with Big Helga all those years ago.
Enjoy the break folks,
The Govanhill Gub